Reassurance and OCD

I read a lot of posts on this forum and found specific topics particularly helpful. But maybe someone can also share how they deal with constant reassurance seeking. I feel relieved and safe after someone confirms what I want to hear. However, I notice that I am somewhat toxic and annoying to the people around me in this way.

I am lucky not to experience reassurance-seeking myself, at least not noticeably. That’s why that article is worth 10 minutes of yours - Reassurance Seeking OCD | Is Seeking Reassurance Good Or Bad For OCD?.
Apart from the other helpful information, doing ERP therapy might benefit you with this issue. I am a fan of ERP, so consider learning more about it.

Fixing reassurance-seeking might be tricky because it’s how you are used to being confident when others approve that something is true. I also think therapy will help break those behavior patterns, but you need to dedicate your time and effort to a great extent.

When I need advice, I do something straightforward but smart. I imagine that the person who asks for advice is someone else, and I am the specialist. That way, I give my objective opinion, write it down, and then it looks like it comes from somebody else. You can try similar techniques when you need reassurance.

It sounds like something I want to try. I wish to know how do you do it exactly? Do you write down the questions you are asking yourself?

I personally don’t write anything down. I pretend to be the person giving advice and knowing my problem. I explain the suggestions as if I am advising a friend. If you feel that you need to write it down so that you don’t forget what you are asking, do it. You got the meaning, so do the process in the way it feels most accessible to you.

Sounds pretty straightforward. I had heard about that technique before but didn’t give it any further consideration. I will try it out this week and share whether it was effective. I have a strange feeling that it might help me indeed.

I love this technique. Even though I don’t use it much these days, I always found it incredibly useful. I still remember how it helped me a few years ago when deciding which life-changing opportunity to take. I literally used my brain to give me a piece of unbiased advice for myself.

Haha, I love how you worded this. It is precisely how this technique works, and I honestly wonder why you don’t use it in your daily life. I am addicted to it.

I somehow use it automatically or at least have a sense of that. When I need to make a vital decision, my brain is well-versed at looking from different perspectives and coming up with a weighted decision. Maybe after you use the method for a few years, your brain will get used to it the same way as mine did.

I wish to reach that state where my brain can make decisions by itself without me overthinking it. But you are right that it depends on the proper habits we build. Do you have any bad habits you still haven’t gotten rid of?

I just shared another discussion topic here about the 21/90 rule, which helps build new habits. I used to waste too much time on unnecessary activities before, and this rule helped me manage my time better. I’m sure it can help you with less overthinking.

I will rely on this technique for important decisions then. It would be game-changing since I would not need someone to approve my decisions. I hope so, at least.

It would be game-changing for sure, mate. Moreover, you will see an increased improvement in all the other areas of your life. Just be patient until you see lasting results, and don’t give up trying to get used to it as most people do.

I will have a look at your post about that rule. I sometimes just waste my time thinking about situations that either don’t depend on me or are imaginary, and I will most likely not happen in the future.

For now, it doesn’t work. I cant stop thinking that my opinion or any decision I am about to make is not intelligent enough or could be better. Probably I have confidence issues apart from any other form of OCD.

The thing with reassurance OCD is that you seek reassurance to reduce your anxiety. Therefore, you need to work mainly on treating that condition. From what I have read and heard, ERP may be the best method for dealing with that OCD subtype.

Can I do ERP on my own, or do I necessarily need to go somewhere? I guess I can find self-help videos about doing ERP on sites like YouTube.

I am personally unsure about all the pros and cons of doing ERP on your own. As far as I know, some individuals with OCD have achieved results doing the therapy on their own. Is it Unsafe to Do ERP Therapy On Your Own? - YouTube Try to watch and see what this person has to say.

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Thanks, mate. I have already found similar videos, and the pros outweigh the cons for me, so I will try the therapy on my own first.